Wishing others were thinner.....

Alrighty, so maybe this is a dangerous discussion to broach, but I live dangerously....

All women are neurotic about their weight, whether they think they are too fat or too tiny, whatever.

Let's just start with a girl with a little chub. I am one of those girls. My arms look fairly thin, my legs look pretty good, but I gain my weight on my belly, and so it looks like I am slightly pregnant (no joke, someone even asked me when my baby is due. doh.). If you were dating me, what would be healthy and positive ways to encourage me to lose weight, or keep it off if I lost it? Let's see... the most important thing, is if I DO lose some weight NOTICE. "Wow, honey, you are just looking better and better every day!" "Those pants look really good on you!" "Your stomach looks SOOOO FLAT! What have you been doing! It is wonderful to see you looking to so hot!" I have lost weight in a relationship and my boyfriend barely noticed, but when I gained it back he sure did. I am sure I would have stayed more motivated if I had gotten a really strong positive response from him.

What NOT TO DO: Do NOT ever comment on what she is eating. There is no way you can go about making a commentary of her food without sticking your foot in it. She will eat what she wants or what makes her happy, and if you try to change that, then you will be in the doghouse. Do not say that she has gained some weight, or size. Do not tell her something makes her look fat (instead say "I really like the blue dress, can you wear that one instead?".

If you really want to help your girl to exercise more you can say something like "I was thinking of getting you a gym membership for your birthday/christmas/etc. but I didn't konw if you would like something like that. Would you?" and see what she says. If she says 'why? do you think I need it?" don't be a dumbass by answering yes. Instead respond with something like "I think everyone needs a place to hang out, get out their aggressions, and learn to relax/de-stress/pamper themselves. Don't you want to spoil yourself? I think you deserve that." It needs to be about what will help her in her life, and to get what she wants, not about YOU getting what YOU want.

Also, if your girl starts to lose weight and you want her to lose more you can say wonderful things like "wow, if you keep losing weight like this I will have to buy you a new wardrobe!" and "you keep looking younger and younger! I think what you are doing is really working for you!"

Ok, so is that a good start? Feel free to post your questions and comments! All questions/comments are monitored, so they won't post directly. This means you can include your email address and I will remove it before I post the comment. Otherwise you can sign up for a free blogger account so that I may respond directly with you:)